Positives

The other day my mom asked me, "Do you like being pregnant?" My immediate reaction was to say "NO," but the more I thought about it and all the complaints I've had, I realized it's not really as bad as I often think it is. So here's a list of all the pregnancy perks.

1.) FOOD. It's delicious, it's comforting, and when you're pregnant... it's often free. I've noticed that people love to feed a pregnant lady, and I rarely turn down food. You know when you go to a restaurant and you're splitting an appetizer and there's just ONE left on the plate? Yup... it all goes to the pregnant lady. After all, she's eating for two right? Waiters and waitresses bring extra food, neighbors stop by with baked goods, and at a buffet, everyone insists you go first. At first I tried to be modest about it and turn down all the offers, but I quickly got to the point where food seemed to be my fuel, and I welcomed it with open arms, and an open mouth.

2.) Maternity pants. I don't know why I haven't been wearing these my whole life. They're jeans, with a sweatpants waist on them! No more unbuttoning those jeans after a big meal, and with a growing belly, I can really let it all hang out. People used to say, "You're pregnant? You don't look pregnant." My response was always, "Just wait till after I eat."

3.) No alcohol. I'm not really a big drinker, so going to parties was often a big chore to avoid peer pressure. No matter how many times I would turn down drinks they would still find a way of showing up in front of me, and since people paid for them, it would be rude not to drink them, right? Then I end up with heartburn all night and the worry about when I'll be able to drive home. Now when I go to parties, people offer me more food instead of booze. It's a major win.

4.) No period. Enough said.

5.) Gifts for the baby. I've never been very good at receiving gifts. I get shy over the attention, and guilt that someone spent money on me, and I end up constantly thinking of ways to pay them back. Now all the gifts that come my way are for the baby, and I get so excited for him! He's not even born and people are loving him enough to buy him little outfits and make him blankets, and it warms my heart more than I ever thought possible. I want nothing but the best for him, and I'm so thankful for the generosity of my family, friends, and total strangers who are welcoming him into the world with so much love.

6.) Extra attention from the husband. He's been AMAZING. He goes with me to all my doctor appointments, he always makes sure I'm content, and he's willing to go downstairs and get me water in the middle of the night. If that's not love, then I don't know what is. He carries laundry for me, mows the lawn, goes on walks with me, and lends an ear when I'm getting emotional and scared about everything that's going to happen in the next three months. I'm so lucky to have him, and I know he's going to be an awesome dad.

7.) Overall Support. This whole experience has been overwhelming, exciting, and terrifying, but the support from family members, friends, and total strangers have really helped me more than I can say. When I was suffering with morning sickness, one of my dearest friends put together a care package for me with accupressure wrist bands, soothing tea, and candies to fight of morning sickness. It was a lifesaver. I had a LOT of depression, fear, and anxiety about being pregnant when month four rolled around, and finally I broke down and called my sister crying my eyes out. She talked me through all my fears and let me know that everything I was going through emotionally was normal, and after over an hour on the phone and a few calls throughout the day to check on me, I was ok again. It was a scary time, and she really helped me through it. At month five my doctor had concerns about my blood pressure, so my mother in law called me up and said she's going to walk with me every day to help get my blood pressure down, and get me exercising in prep for what may or may not be a difficult labor. I've been walking with her almost everyday now, and my blood pressure is back to normal, my energy level is up, and I'm no longer in the danger zone. Friends who I haven't talked to in years are meeting up with me and giving me tons of much needed advice, and they're suggesting Facebook groups and support groups to go to for answers and help. It's just nice to know I'm not alone in my fears, excitement, and pregnancy symptoms, and I'm SO thankful for all these wonderful people in my life.

8.) Moments of extreme euphoria. There are days when I'm so happy I feel like I'm going to start throwing up rainbows. On those days I pick projects to do around the house, and I get a LOT done. I pruned all my roses in one afternoon, I've made fabulous dinners, and I've cleaned every corner of every room. Who needs drugs when you've got hormones?

9.) Ability to fall asleep anywhere. I guess this can be a pro or con... depends on how you look at it. When I'm tired, I fall asleep FAST now, and even if I'm not tired, I'll sit down on the couch and open my eyes to discover that I fell asleep for two hours. I've never been more well rested in my life, which is probably why I wake up at 3am or 5am every morning and go back to sleep at 6am. Everyone tells me to cherish the sleep I'm getting now, and believe me, I do.

10.) Maternity pants. Just had to throw that in there again. Seriously... they're incredible.

Painting

I always dreamed of painting fun murals on my kids walls someday, and now that I spend a lot of time at home, I finally had the time to get started. A very talented friend of mine came over one night, and we got started on painting some fun murals on Z's wall.

I fired up the tracing machine and we got Buzz Lightyear battling Emperor Zurg sketched out on the wall near his bookcase. My friend spent hours painting and fine tuning him, and this is the result! He looks SPECTACULAR!!

I got started on Emperor Zurg, after a few quick glances at my friend's incredible work, I decided to let her finish him, and I moved on to another wall.

I originally wanted the whole theme of the bedroom to be cowboys, and although we strayed a little bit with Buzz and Zurg, I knew I wanted something extra special above his crib. I found the PERFECT image in an old coloring book, and with help from the tracing machine, got it up on the wall.

Whenever I had the time or patience I would get to work and do little bits at a time. Standing for long periods of time was taking it's toll on my back, so work was very slow.

By New Years, Jesse and Woody were ironically starting to look like Kathy Griffin and Anderson Cooper, and all I wanted was to get this thing done.

 Weeks later, I pulled a very late night and finally got it done! I had considered doing fun paintings like this all around his room, but I think I'm done. That is... unless I can convince my friend (who lives a lifetime away and is planning a wedding and moving) to do a couple more. Seriously... she's amazing and could make a fortune doing this professionally.

I'm so proud of this! I hope he doesn't grow up hating Toy Story...

Adjusting

Not only has unemployment taken some time to get used to, but so has creating a human being. My back hurts all day, I'm not as limber as I used to be, and my body is constantly changing.

We bought a very tall bed earlier in the year, and I had to put a stool beside it so I can literally climb into bed each night. My nightstand consists of Tums (for my now constant acid reflux), Kleenex (for my always runny nose),  Prenatal Vitamins, and a brand new lamp for when nature calls three times a night. I'm not supposed to sleep on my back anymore, so I've become a side sleeper which is also difficult, not that any of that matters because I seem to be up all night anyway.

I can't bend over anymore to pick things up off the ground, if I get in my car and leave the car door open too far, I have to get back out to reach it because leaning out isn't possible anymore. It's hard to get up off the ground if I decide to sit there, and even getting off the couch is starting to be difficult. The husband has to carry the laundry up and down the stairs for me now because when I do it, I can feel all my stomach muscles pulling, and it's pretty painful.

I've lost all feeling in my fingers, and it only gets worse when my hands swell up to an enormous size after walking or eating. Food still tastes amazing, but everything gives me acid reflux so I don't look forward to meals as much as I used to.

I've got three months to go, and I'm only going to get bigger and more uncomfortable. How did Mrs. Duggar do this NINETEEN TIMES? I think I'm starting to figure it out...

A few nights ago my husband and I were laying in bed watching TV, and as usual I could feel baby Z wiggling around in my stomach. I looked down and saw him poking out of my skin! I jumped in surprise and screamed, and for the next twenty minutes we sat there staring at my stomach watching it move and shift until finally the baby fell asleep. As creepy as it was, it was still pretty amazing to see, and I can't wait to hold my little guy in my arms and cover him with kisses.

Nursery

Before we learned that Zachary was a Zachary and not a Zoey or Magnolia, my husband's mom took us crib shopping and we picked out the PERFECT crib. I had decided long ago that the bedroom colors would be blue, yellow, and bright red no matter what, so with the exception of a mural, there wouldn't be much painting needed. So the day the crib arrived, we were ready to set it up. I'm in LOVE with it!

We've been holding off buying anything else for the room until we knew the gender, but we had a plan. If baby was a girl, the room would be themed to houses and the movie "Up," and if baby was a boy, there would be a cowboy and "Toy Story" theme. We SWORE we wouldn't go crazy... and then we went to Costco. 

Are those not the biggest stuffed animals you've ever seen?? You'll probably be seeing those a lot when Zach is born in April because my photographer sister already has big plans to use them as props in his newborn pictures.

Life

Ever since High School I've had a set plan for how my life was going to be, and there was no room for changes.

1.) I would work at Disneyland to get through college. (Done!)

2.) When graduating college, I would get my dream job at a very specific radio station, doing one very specific thing. (Nobody believed I would ever do that, but I did. Done!)

3.) Meet the man of my dreams and marry him. (Done!)

4.) Get pregnant with my first, and quit my job to be a stay at home mom. (Now this is where it gets interesting...)

In my life plan I said I would have two kids, a boy first, then a girl. Throughout this pregnancy, I SWORE I was having a girl and it was strange to me because that wasn't part of my "plan." Also, being a stay at home mom just wasn't an option yet because of money.

Last Thursday I was sitting at home and noticed that I wasn't getting my work email on my phone, then the text messages starting coming in from friends, "Are you ok?" "OMG... Call me when you can..." At that point I knew I was getting laid off, and sure enough the phone call came. Hearing the words "Your position has been eliminated" was like getting hit by a truck, and with my hormones already raging, I didn't take the news lightly. I'm five months pregnant, and unemployed.  

Later that day while rehashing what had happened, I came to a shocking realization... whether I like it or not, I'm a stay at home mom, and this was all part of my life plan. Oh crap... that means there's no way I'm having a girl, I'm having a boy!

The next morning while laying on the table in the doctor's office waiting for the ultrasound, I asked the woman to please give me good news because I really needed some. She smiling and started the ultrasound and typed up on the screen the big letters "BOY."

At that very moment I knew I was exactly where I needed to be, and everything was going to be ok. 

Food

As I said in the previous post, food has never tasted better. Everything I eat is the best thing I've ever eaten, so I look forward to every meal. One thing I've noticed since announcing my pregnancy is that people love to feed a pregnant girl, and I've loved being fed. Going to work is always exciting, because I never know what's going to show up on my desk.

And I don't just get food, my BFF at work got me this beautiful Hydrangea the day I announced the news to the office. Needless to say, I'm a lucky girl.

Symptoms

They say every pregnancy is different, and there have been plenty of surprises with mine so far.

Morning Sickness:

You've all heard me talk about this... so I'll keep it brief. It sucked. A LOT. It was a major success if I could stand up to dry my hair and brush my teeth. I told my husband to enjoy this baby because I would never have another one ever again. The last day I ever complained about it was when I went in to get some blood drawn. I mentioned my morning sickness to the nurse and she told me that she lost 75 pounds during her pregnancy and was hospitalized because her morning sickness was so bad for the ENTIRE NINE MONTHS. I never complained again, and lucky for me, the sickness went away after about 8 weeks. 

Cravings:

I had plenty of food aversions in the first trimester, and I was REALLY excited to see what I would crave. For a while I wanted nothing but Rubio's chicken tacos, then Chipotle, then cheese enchiladas, then I realized that no matter what food I thought of... I wanted it terribly. I noticed that every single thing I ate was the best thing I've ever eaten in my life. We went on a vacation to North Carolina and Florida, and all I wanted was cheeseburgers. I must of had one every single day, and just thinking about it now makes me want to drive over to Bob's Big Boy and pick one up. Oh, and baked potatoes.. I can't get enough! So as much as this sounds like it would be a "craving," I can live without it, and I have NEVER considered going out for a late night food run. I'm just going to say that those are the foods that always sounded good to me, and not really something I craved. And besides... I wanted all those things every day BEFORE I was pregnant.

Weight Gain:

This always scared me the most, but it hasn't been as bad as I thought it would be. Sure my boobs have reached world record sizes, but other than that, everything has stayed the same till fairly recently. (Keep in mind... I'm two days away from hitting the five month mark.) I've gained six pounds so far which isn't too bad, and only last week did I discover that my jeans were way too uncomfortable to wear. My mom and mom in law have filled my closet with maternity clothes and tonight I'm wearing maternity jeans for the very first time. I will never wear regular jeans again.

Skin and Hair:
I always thought pregnancy would give me a glorious head of hair, and that perfect "glow" every talks about,  but it's done the opposite. My face is breaking out, and my hair is falling out and going limp. It's a total bummer, but it's only temporary... right?

Mood Swings:
My husband might tell you differently, but I think I've been pretty reasonable. I've had maybe 4 emotional meltdowns. The first one happened while I was answering phones at work and I broke down crying uncontrollably out of fear of what's going to happen to my body. The second one happened the next day when I was telling my husband about the meltdown at work. The third happened when I was heading home from a trip to the river that I went on with my parents. I cried for an hour and a half non stop because I realized that I'll probably never get that alone time with my parents ever again, because I'll always have a baby with me now. And the fourth one happened when the husband and I were getting ready for bed and I started sobbing out of control because I missed my grandparents who passed away four years ago. Hormones do strange things... and I think I've been lucky. But then again, I've still got four months to go.

Overall I think I'm doing alright with everything. I sneeze a lot, and I had to put a step stool by my bed to help me climb up there, but other than that, I'm almost accustomed  to this pregnancy.

Oh! And here's my bump! I'm just shy of 18 weeks, and baby is the size of a sweet potato. Just in time for Thanksgiving...