Excitement

I still can't believe I'm getting married! This is REALLY happening! We got to see a proof of our wedding invites and there are even better than I remembered.

My fears of walking down the isle have just about gone away, and now it's been replaced with nervous excitement. I keep thinking that 150 sets of eyes will be on me, but there is only one set of eyes that will matter. I hope he likes my dress, I hope my dad doesn't make me cry too much, and I hope I don't vomit all over myself half way down the isle.

Yahoo keeps posting articles like "How to Know if He Really Loves You," and "Signs That Your Relationship is Doomed," and I always enjoy reading them because he passes EVERY criteria for a good guy, and NOTHING about the doomed relationship resembles us at all. He's the real deal, and unlike anyone I have ever met. Is this getting too mushy?

I'm all over the place with this blog today, but at the same time, my thoughts are all over the place as well. Guest book, engagement shoot, 30 more placecards, losing weight... it'll all be worth it in a few more months.

Dreams

Isn't that an awesome bed? I totally want it! Anyway, that's not what this blog is about. It's about dreams. Well, night terrors to be exact.

When I was little I was tormented with horrible dreams every night, and terrifying visions. I would wake up to a tiny witch standing on my pillow who tried to suffocate me, I would wake up covered in bees, ants, and spiders, and I would see people standing in my closet, at my desk, or sometimes at the foot of my bed. My bedroom was haunted. My radio would turn on in the middle of the night with the music at full volume, and strange voices would keep me awake. Bedtime was the worst time of the day, or night I guess, and even though I grew used to it over the years, it never really got easier to handle.

When I moved out, I was thrilled to escape the horrors of my corner bedroom, and I finally learned what it was like to sleep peacefully. Until now.

I've moved from apartment to apartment with no problem, and now I live with my fiance in a little house in a nice neighborhood. The terrors started again late one night when I woke up to find myself in the middle of a game show, in my own bedroom. The music was deafening, and I had to covevr my ears to drown it out. I started to panic, but I had nowhere to run, and when I looked down at my sleeping fiance, I honestly had no idea who he was, or where I was. Isn't that scary? It's weird because I'm awake, I know where I am, and I know it's not possible for all these people to be in my room, but it's so real that I HAVE to believe it. It's been happening more and more, and according to my poor fiance, I've started to become violent. I yell at him, scream at people to "Go away," and thrash about in utter panic. Last night I woke up and saw a little girl handing me my laptop and I told my fiance that his little sister just wouldn't leave me alone. Ummm... he doesn't have a sister.

There is no pattern to these "episodes" and I really have no idea what's going on. The visions only happen at night, I've had them all my life, and I stopped believing in ghosts a while back. I just hope I can find a way to stop them.

Ring

Today we went to Robbins Brothers to cross another thing off our wedding To Do list. We ordered his wedding band! He was a little nervous going into the store because the last time he was there, he spent six hours picking out my engagement ring, and he wasn't looking forward to another overwhelming experience. However, he did know exactly what he wanted, so it was a breeze! He got a simple thick white gold band and I must say, it looks good on him. We get to go back tomorrow to pick it up, then we're going to figure out something cute and clever to get engraved on the inside.

What about my wedding band? Simple... I already have it! About six months into dating, he gave me a beautiful promise ring that is a band of diamonds, and totally cute. I've decided to use that as my wedding band. It's so special and means to much to me, and I can't wait to wear it again.

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"Do you like turtles?"

Italy

My first (and only) trip to Italy was an unforgettable experience, but there is one memory that stands out quite vividly. When our bus first arrived in Florence, the first thing we did was get dinner. We went into a tiny restaurant and took our seats at a very long table, with lots of very hairy Italian waiters. The table I was at was mostly girls, and being teenagers, we were full of giggles. We ordered our drinks and as we were talking, a VERY hairy arm reached over my shoulder and poured a glass of wine. The girl across from me whispered, "He's very hairy," and suddenly a dark and rugged face with crazy eyes leaned over the table and in a very thick italian accent said, "Hairy like monkey, no?" Then he proceeded to make money noises. We didn't know whether to laugh, or bury our heads in humiliation.

I spent the rest of the meal avoiding eye contact with the waiters, and picking at the mysterious breaded meat that I had been served. It's never a good thing when you can't figure out if what you are eating is chicken or pork. It was time to leave the restaurant and check in at our hotel, and as I walked down a very narrow hallway to the front of the restaurant, I heard a small sound in the doorway to my left. I stopped to look and in the dark, was our hairy waiter friend with the crazy eyes. He had a deranged smile on his face and he started barking, growling, and snapping at me. I prayed that the rest of my experience in Italy wouldn't be like that, and I got the hell out of that restaurant.

Invitations

Time to cross invites off the list! We ordered them this lovely Mother's Day weekend and we are quite pleased with them. We didn't go with our first choice, because we couldn't bring ourselves to spend $500 on something that is just going to be thrown away in a few months.

Also on the list is booking our honeymoon flight, getting our engagement pictures, finding a hair and makeup person (for me), and getting my handsome fiance a handsome wedding band. There are some other odds and ends on the To Do list, but those are the major ones. My bridesmaids and I have been working non stop on paper cranes, and putting them on strings for the tables, and working on place cards. I really don't know what I would ever do without them.

Four months to go!

Paper

Ladies and gentlemen... we have our invites! Well, almost. Over the weekend we went to a magical place that had literally a wall of binders filled with wedding invites. We searched, we scanned, we compared, and we have narrowed it down to TWO. We're going to make the final decision this coming weekend, possibly over a giant plate of fried chicken.



I hung out with one of my lovely bridesmaids today and when we walked into our local craft store, it was the very first thing we saw. A Wedding Card Box. (If guests bring a card to the wedding, they put it in the box instead of leaving it all alone on a table. It makes sense right?) SO FREAKIN CUTE! Black and white... CHECK! One more thing off the list? Make that an even bigger CHECK. We're getting there!